Monked

Seeing as there’s nothing really new or interesting going on in my life right now, I’ll take this time to complain about something I’ve probably complained about too much already, the monk.

As some of you already know, a monk is currently living with me and has been for about a month now. Why you ask? Because his family is friends with mine and he’s giving talks here. I don’t really understand either so that’s as good of an explanation as your going to get, deal with it.

Swamiji has actually stayed with us before; he used to stay with us almost once a year for some time, but the last time he visited was probably before fifth grade. The thing I most remember about these visits was that I was forced against my will to eat vegetarian. I’m sure the protein deficiency during these visits stunted my development, and so I’ve held a perfectly justifiable grudge against him ever since.

Here’s just an excerpt of the fun that’s ensued:

Mom: Yes, there are several Africans that work at FAMU, they’re very smart.

Me (OBVIOUSLY sarcastic): What’s a race that you wouldn’t call smart, Mom?

At this point the monk takes the liberty to teach me that everyone is blessed equally by god, and it is their opportunity that determines the amount of development and success. Yes, I know I shouldn’t have used sarcasm, but I wasn’t even addressing him was I? Did I deserve to be lectured on my “racist ways”? No.

Later on in the conversation the monk wonders out loud why so many Americans don’t support providing for the poor and welfare as much as other developed countries. I then say that they might be so afraid of anything that seems socialist because of the Cold War, even if it’s at the cost of the people. I then receive a free history lesson on how the Cold War was not a real war, but entirely in people’s minds. Thank you.

So now I avoid saying mostly anything that is answering a direct question. Not that I hold it against the monk, it’s just easier if I do.

And one of the cutting boards is missing. I’m not pointing any fingers, all I’m saying is that I didn’t move it, and he’s the only other person here.

-Viv